Higher Learning for Preschoolers

As children reach closer to the age of 5 or school age learning, the fears, anxiety, pressures and worries begin. Will my child do well in school? Should we homeschool? Do we pick French Immersion, Art School, Private School or another choice school? Who is my child, what can they handle, what can I handle? Will my decisions affect the rest of their life? Who will their teachers be? Their friends? Are they ready to cope? This is not always an easy transition for parents or children.

Parent know that this world has become a highly competitive world and because we want them to succeed we want them to learn as much as they can as fast as they can, but is that always the best way?

What have we learned about children and brain development in the last decade or so? The early years are critically important in the formation of thinking and reasoning skills. The brain begins to wire itself. The brain then continues to grow and learn throughout childhood and adolescence. The prefrontal cortex of the brain which is responsible for emotional regulation, impulse control and more adult forms of reasoning, does NOT fully develop until the age of 25 years old. 25 years old! Remember this the next time your frustrated with your 16 year old and their lack of self control or emotional stability.

For the first three years of a child's life, the brain is "under construction." In these years what he observes around him, experiences and decides about himself and others will become part of the wiring of his brain.

Q. What primes learning?
A. Stimulation from the outside world. When a child hears, touches, smells, tastes and sees something, this enable the brain to create or change connections in his wiring. These small windows could be missed and it may be more difficult to acquire these abilities later in life. Language development and vision are some of the earlier necessary learning that takes place. This is why pretend play can be so valuable and important. The parents that are excellent at pretend play have children will larger vocabularies and higher reasoning skills later on.

By the age of 10 a child's brain begins to 'prune away the synapses' that haven't been used enough. By adolescence, half have been discarded. For some functions, brain development is a 'use it or lose it' proposition.

Some parents worry their children may not be ready to learn when other children are. Should we be teaching them so many academics and flash carding them all time? Shouldn't we be smashing in as much information as possible right now before it's too late?

The truth is children learn in different ways.
Some researchers agree that it could actually be harmful to force children to learn too quickly or absorb concepts their brain is not mature enough to handle. You may be patching connections in the brain with information that is not fully understood and therefore is less effective and this may have an impact on this skill later in life because it was wired in wrong early on.

Forcing children to learn before they were ready may have psychological effects as well. They may experience self doubt, thinking they are not smart enough or good enough if they have difficulty mastering a concept. They may feel too intimidated to even try and therefore start to exhibit inadequacy behaviours.

The truth is young children learn best in the context of relationships and hands on learning. Brain development is about connections. How the caregivers relate to her, how you talk, play and nurture your relationship is far more important than how to count to 10. Children learn best when they are unstressed and when they live in a stimulating environment says Ross A Thompson, a professor at University of California and a founding member of National Scientific Council on Developing Children.  (www.developingchild.net)

Play actually meets all the criteria a child needs to learn at this age.Since they learn best in the context of 'relationships' to others and their environment, what they need most is active involvement. Children learn by using their senses: sight, smell, hearing, taste and touch. They need opporunities to connect new information. Play allow this. Children usually want TO DO rather than watch. Let them get messy squeezing mud through their fingers or throwing your decorative pillows on the floor to become lily pads for him to jump across to the island you call a couch.

Q. How do we encourage play?
A. Lets say they learned something about snakes. You read some information about snakes, then on a nature walk, you encountered a Garter snake. You showed a video on this snake and later you observe your child playing with plastic snakes. Later still he is slithering on the ground hissing like a snake. You can encourage this learning. Become the mouse and let him chase you and eat you up. Tell him he's scaly or slimy. Play with him! He will learn much more about snakes and their habitat through your pretend play and it will wire itself into his memory to use later on when he may want a deeper learning about animals and habitats. Play is your child's way of working and developing his healthy brain.

Some tips on what is most important at such a young age.
-Demonstarting affection, interest and acceptance of your child
-Practice conversation, pretend play, open questions
-Read to them, with them, around them often
-Encourage hands on learning, curiosity, show them the resources
-Limit television time, there is no critical thinking going on, it is a very passive activity
-Use gentle positive discipline, do not shame, threaten or humiliate a child
-Recognize and accept your child's uniquness
-Provide learning through play, especially as a preschooler
-Select childcare carefully and stay involved
-Provide raw materials and hands on activities that they can choose and manipulate themselves
-Take care of yourself, children learn through observation how they should treat themselves.

Creativity, Imagination and Flexibility - Raising kids 101

This morning my 4 and 2 year old were fighting a bit over a toy issue. The 4 year old would not allow the 2 year old to play with the big pirate ship. They each had their little men, but the cooperative play wasn't happening. When my two year old came to me, my first thought was awe, this sad little boy, How dare that 4 year old of mine not let him play! But I took a breath and asked what was going on. He said GG wouldn't let him play with the Pirate Ship. So I immediately got a small satchel of coins and passed it to the two year old and then I said quite loudly. Here is some pirate treasure, when you show this to the captain, he will let you on his ship.

Guess what? It worked. 1 cool idea at a time.

Unschooling Update

Are you an unschooler? Do you have children between 3-10 years old? Would you like to work with other highly committed parents and their children 2 times a week for group learning experiences? Learn more at FreeSchool, opening in the fall. Group project building, hands on learning, field trips and more. The projects are child led, interest driven, natural, organic, eclectic and self directed.

To get on the waiting list simple follow these steps:
1. Like our page
2. Message Freeschool with your name, email/contact info, number and age of children
3. Keep checking back for opening date in Sept.

Free School: https://www.facebook.com/FVFreeSchool
Related links:
http://www.pwnhc.ca/teach/downloads/Project_Based_Learning.pdf

Pretty excited about our new journey.
Feel free to follow our forum on the Project Based Homeschooling Blog of Lori Pickert as well.
Under Preschool check out Starting a Group Project
http://project-based-homeschooling.com/forums/preschool/topic/starting-group-project

Rules of Kindness 50 tips

I read this great article, and I loved it so much I wanted to copy the idea for my own children. Feel free to share at least one of yours from each category and add it in the comments.

Tell your child:
1. I love you
2. I love you even when I'm frustrated with you.
3. I love you even when your mad at me.
4. I love you always behind any behaviour, I love you no matter what.

LISTEN
5. Even if you don't agree with what they say
6. Listen to kid songs over and over if they love it
7. To their questions
8.  Even if your visiting, take a second and listen
9. For feelings behind the words

TRY
10. Using a kind tone
11. To eat, drink and sleep enough
12. Dancing, jumping, moving
13. Not being sarcastic

PLAY
14. Board games (over and over)
15. On the floor with the kids
16.  Outside
17. 15mintues a day with no interuptions (no tv/cell/computer)

PRETEND
18. To catch their kisses in your hand
19. Your hugs and kisses tank are empty and they have to fill it

ASK
20. Why your feeling this way? HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired?)
21. What are you thinking?
22. What do you want to know more about?
23. How are you feeling?
24. What will happen next?

SHARE
25. The story of their name
26. How mommy and daddy met
27. That sometimes you struggle too
28. When you hold hands and squeeze it 3 times, it's a secret code you meaning, "I Love You"

GRATEFUL
29. For the little messes they make while becoming independent
30. Toys on the bottom of tub, cause one day they will be gone
31. Hugs and clingy love, cause one day it will be no more

TRUST
32. That everything will work out, it always has
33. Your child is more capable than you know
34. That you are enough
35. Your human and it's ok to make mistakes

LET GO
36. Of guilt
37. Of how you envisioned it to go
38. Of trying to be perfect or right

CHOOSE 
39. To be happy
40. Find beauty
41. To carve our relaxing time for you
42. Show a kind face and calm body

KNOW
43. When you need a time out
44. When to say nothing and just hug

SHOW
45. Affection to your spouce and yourself
46. How to garden and enjoy outdoors
47. How much reading is part of your own life
48. How to whistle

AND
50. Smile when your child enters the room.

Original Idea:
http://creativewithkids.com/100-ways-to-be-kind-to-your-child/

Project Based Homeschooling

As many of you know and for those who don't, I am embarking into new waters. I am beginning to shift my 'unschooling' plan into a 'project based homeschooling.' I'm trying something new. I found a core group of women with this same shared idea and we are going to start our own project building together with our kids.

We had our first 'adult' meeting and went through the Steps for "How to Start a Project Group" by Lori Pickard. From her book, "Project Based Homeschooling."
 http://project-based-homeschooling.com/about

 What is project-based homeschooling? It’s the same educational values applied to learning at home. It’s about combining personal interests with long-term, deep, complex learning. It is a way of learning centered on making, doing, sharing, collaborating, and acquiring real skills.

You can use your ability to 'draw, paint, build, act, create' and incorporate them into learning whatever your interests are.

We had our first meeting, some of us as practically strangers, others have been life long friends. It went really well. 6 of us together were able to have a better understanding on our collective goal. We are all very excited about this endeavor. We decided to start a sharing circle with the kids at first. To include the 15min free play at the beginning of our meets with the kids. To have a meet 2 times a week at least from 10-12 if they last that long. Our kids range from 1.5 - 7 years old. We were talking about having the kids say their name and talk about what they did in the last week to get to know each other. For the next 3 sessions will be just allowing more creative play and having raw materials out for the them to build with while we begin observing and writing down shared interests, questions and ideas.

We hope to start a shared group project as of April 1st. I'll try to remember to keep you all posted. I feel like a fish out of school waters. I am enjoying it.

-Amanda

From baby to child

I saw a mother the other day googling over her new baby. She oddles him and cooed at him etc. Then before getting into the car, she picked him up and kissed him gently, tucked him slowly and chatted a bit before shutting the door. I've seen this a lot, pretty regular thing for new parents.

I began to wonder why am I rushing? How come I don't take this time much any more. With my toddler on hip and 4 year old racing ahead, I began to feel like life was rushing away. So I slowed down. I walked a bit slower on purpose. I looked into the eyes of my two year old and we chatted a bit. I held my 4 year old's hand and we stopped at a few things I wasn't interested in, but he was. We chatted, I got down to their level. It was wonderful.

I think I used up about 30min longer than usual. I remember I use to take more time when baby was young, feeling 'privileged' as a new mom to do so. When did we become these people who are too busy to show down to the tiny foot step strides of our children?

I'd like to try to keep my steps slow, let my 2 year old guide the steps and our pace. In the meantime, I try to make sure I look my babies in their eyes when I put them in the van. I give hugs and kissed before putting them in as I did when they were babies. I'm enjoying this child pace.

Project Based Homeschooling - the beginning

I've been reading and learning about Project Based Homeschooling, but more to the point, about child led and child directed learning. Even as young as 2 years old, we are able to help mentor our babies to learn how to self-manage and self-direct their own learning.

What a cool thought; a child who cares about his learning. I want to learn how to teach my children to directs their own projects and create their own ideas and pursues them for as long or as little as they likes. As a new homeschooler, this was the reason why I wanted to start this journey to begin with. I'm so excited to see how the next few years unfold and I'm excited to watch my children grow, create and learn.

I'd like to share a bit of what I've learned so far.

In Project Based Homeschooling (PBH), you hone in on what interests your child has and stay there as long as they are interested. You are in the room with materials, support, feedback, interest. Your taking notes, taking pictures, writing down their ideas, questions, arguements. Try to resist the urge to 'direct' out of fear they may not be learning all you think they need to be learning.  Allow them to work through their challenges as much as possible, when they ask for help, be an asking parent. "What do you think it needs? What will happen next? What are you trying to accomplish? How can I help you? What materials do you think you'll need for that?"

Truth is they are learning tons by play acting, creating, project building and talking with others. Even children that go to traditional school will be missing information and have holes in their learning after they graduate. With a child who has been taught how to learn, create and direct their own learning, you will have a child who has the skills to fill in those holes with enthusiasm. After a child graduates the learning doesn't stop. They have the choice to continue to read, learn and create or not. I'd rather have a child who is an enthusiastic and creative learner who is missing a few facts than a child who memorized a few facts but hates to read.

The truth is we are all in charge of our own learning. As many teenagers have proven again and again, "we are not the boss of them." True, you can get them out of bed, drive them to school, throw some books and paper at them, sit them in desks, but then it's all them. They can choose to listen, engage or just fade away or 'get by' with minimum.

Project Based Homeschooling is concerned with the underlying motives, habits an attitudes of  thinking and learning. The point of PBH is to devote some time in your day to help your child manage and direct his or her own learning. This doesn't have to be your entire curriculum or it does.

But it is important to allow this 'free learning time' at some point in your day.

This is part of your child's life where he is free to explore his interests and passions. He receives attention, support, and consistent, dependable mentoring from you, the parent, to help him succeed.

As I am reading all this great juicy stuff I was asking myself, um ya, great, awesome, um... HOW?

This is answered in the few books I've been reading, but in so many different ways. The how, will often depend on your family and your child. It's about becoming the people we want our children to become. Sitting quietly and taking notes and and pictures as your child is playing/creating/building. It goes beyond showing him out use a library card or bake cookies or build a mailbox.

It means being that example of learning. Not in the traditional sense of lecturing and force fed learning, but in everyday immersion in life. A life that shows challenging, meaningful work. It means you are being that life long learner. You are the mentor, the example of what's important. What do you do in a day? What do your children see you doing? Are you reading? Watching tv? Cleaning? Writing books? Painting? What are your passions? They are watching you.

Having a child watch how you handle mistakes and challenges will teach them more about how to mange your emotions than lecturing at them would. Let them see you pursue your dreams, interests, passions. Talk about your dreams, passions and your goals out loud. Let them see you continue to work towards your dreams. First step - become the mentor yourself.

That's all for today. Keep posted for more discoveries on the home front. Feel free to share ideas, questions, and your own homeschool journey. I love chatting with community.

Amanda