Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Don't Bother Calling. (you know I love you)

Come on guys, don't call me in the morning, I'm busy feeding the kids, cleaning dinner dishes up, trying to get out the door while packing lunches and dressing kids who insist on going outside as Batman, a Pirate or a lobster. 
You tried calling in the midmorning? but I was trying to exercise, or mediate, which didn't work cause my 3 year old thought that I was a human jungle gym and it was best to climb this mountain. You called again at noon? Haha, I was cleaning floors, milk spills, crumbs, poopy bums and possibly toilets again, I haven't looked... Somewhere in here I think I was homeschooling, but I don't remember what we read. Try texting.
AND Don't call at 2pm or after, I'm driving kids home from Freeschool, going grocery shopping and shoving errands into my day. Also, I have a melting down 3 year old right now and pretty much every day, it's close to nap time. 3pm is not much better, more bums to wipes and I think there's something sticky in my sons hair.
Why would you call at 4pm?, clearly I'm trying to make dinner with babies on my hip. And as the neighbour can attest, I clearly don't' feed my children' cause they are STARVING!
Hello we are eating and your calling at 5:30pm? I'm so not going to answer the phone, I can't believe you think I can. Oh but my children did, did you hear their halarious laughter and the last thing you heard was my sweet motherly voice YELLING< "Give me the phone!"
You called again at 6:30pm.. hahahahaha We are rushing off to soccer/french/band/babysitting and other hobbies we try to squeeze in so we might feel like a normal adult with some life.
Why would you call between 7-830pm, I'm stressing out trying to keep the kids in their own beds, struggling with brushing the kids teeth. How insensitive, Don't you know?
Ok you really called me at 930pm and expected me to be coherent? What did you say anyhow? Don't you know I'm exhausted and trying to get myself to bed after squeezing in a half an hour of my favourite comedy?
Um, so really just call me in like 14 years or so.

To all these active mommies out there!